Wednesday, May 6, 2015

Getting High Almost Every Day Now

Do I Choose Life or Death?

I have started using drugs almost everyday now.  When I first relapsed I was using only once or twice a week. It didn't take long for me to begin using every day, and now I'm back where I was before I went into rehab.

Using drugs takes the life out of you very quickly. The biggest  problem is it's too hard to stop once  you begin using.  You know what I mean if you're an addict. You say to yourself, I'm not going to use today, and the next thing you know you're going to the drug dealer, you're purchasing drugs, and then you are consuming the drugs.

The bottom line is that drugs lead to an extremely unsatisfying life.  In all aspects. You eventually become unhappy with your partner, you become unhappy with your job, you become angry easily, and you hate the way you live.  Many addicts  become unhappy with the people around them so they create conflict in order to escape those people.  County jail inmates are 80 percent to 90 percent drug addicts.  I know, I have been in and out of prison most of my adult life.

In the previous post on this blog, I wrote about how I was going back to rehab for 90 days. I have a meeting later today with my case manager in which we are going to talk about finding a rehab that is suitable for me and a good match for my needs.

Finding the right rehab is extremely important.  I was discharged early from one of the last rehab facilities I was in because it was not a good match.  I did not get a long with the counselors because they kept forcing me to do things I could not do because of health issues.

I am sure I am going to remain sober when I am discharged from the facility I'm going to. I have been in approximately 13 rehab facilities so I know  first-hand that if I am going to stay sober it is going to be up to me.

As you sober?


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